Clarets Gold: Thomas Pickles

Clarets Gold
No Nay Never
No Nay Never January 8, 2014
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Your mind does not deceive you. Ally Pickering's goal at ... 11 months ago
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This is your chance to revel in some classic Clarets moments and personnel with fellow fans as we share your favourite experiences.

Up next we have NNN contributor and future Doctor Who star Thomas Pickles.

Game
Scunthorpe/Chelsea/Fulham (Maybe Wembley but it wasn’t as good as I’d dreamt of)

There’s a match where we played Scunthorpe United at home and Iffy Onuora scored. I think we lost. It was my birthday. I got a birthday message at half time and felt like the boss of the world. Until Iffy Onuora scored.

For actual football reasons, beating Chelsea was good. My man crush on Ade Akinbiyi escalated from manageable levels to almost verging on stalking. I saw him in Manchester quite recently. I enjoyed that.

Fulham away in the Premier League was a belter with regards to atmosphere. We played rubbish but we sang “Brian Laws’ Claret and Blue Army” for over an hour. We sang it so much and played so badly that I’m not sure if it became ironic or not.

Player
Glen Little/Paul Cook/Gareth Farrelly/Arthur Gnohere

Glen Little. Glen Little. There’s a retired Division Two right back somewhere in the country still unknotting his legs. Glen Little. Magic. I recreated his funny wavy hand goal celebration from the Scunthorpe game for years and years. (I still do it in the shower sometimes.)

King Arthur is, I’m pretty sure, the coolest man alive. Paul Cook was left footed, a centre midfielder and didn’t really look like a football player yet looked a little bit like Zidane. I liked all these things about him. Gareth Farrelly because I spent an entire holiday kicking a ball against a caravan, acting out all the goals which I just knew he’d score during the forthcoming season. I’m not sure why but I was completely convinced that he was going to be properly good. He wasn’t. He was babba. But that summer holiday was brilliant and the imaginary Gareth Farrelly was a big part of it.

Goal
Ally Pickering

One goal and one goal only. Ally Pickering. Stoke City away. It probably wasn’t that good but I was little and over time I think my brain’s turned it in to something almost biblical.

Shout out to Djimi Traore.

Manager
Stan Ternent

I loved Owen Coyle. And for the majority of his time in charge, the whole area was riding a wave. I’m not even too bitter about him leaving. Stan Ternent was my first Burnley manager though. And I think, like with the Ally Pickering goal, the years have transformed him into Zeus in a tracksuit. Unlike Coyle and all the others since Stan’s tenure, I was properly gutted when he left.

Kit
Burnley haven’t had a good home kit in about ten years

The best kit we’ve had in my life was that one which seems synonymous with Kevin Ball. The round necked one. With no sponsor. What a thing of beauty that was. Other than the kit we had for the Premier League, we’ve had some complete monstrosities since. Wrong shades of blue. Over complicated designs. Sleeves so long they could be used to cover the pitch when it rains. Even Jean Louis Valois couldn’t make them look fashionable. And he was our budget Ginola.

If you’d like to share your favourite moments in Clarets Gold, email blog@nonaynever.net with 100ish words for each section and a photo of yourself in Burnley colours if possible. And try to stick to one pick for each part, unlike Pickles!

1 comment
  • Tactical Burger

    Your mind does not deceive you. Ally Pickering’s goal at Stoke was indeed a belter – 25 yard screamer into the top corner. His Dad had died not long before the game and, as a former Stoke player, celebrated like a mad man. Do you remember Super Glen’s goal which he scored following a mazy run despite taking the ball out play? The Stoke fans in the main stand were furious.

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